The Monday before last Pat and I took Henson to Marlboro College, which happens to be the place where we met. It had been seven years since I had been back to "the hill."
Marlboro was not the easiest time for me. Without going into too much detail, I was forced to deal with some things that no eighteen year old should have to deal with. College was supposed to be a time for me to socialize and study. Unfortunately this time was riddled with drama and since then I have been carrying a huge sense of regret. However, Pat and I were celebrating our tenth anniversary since our first date and one of our professors is retiring, so it seemed fitting that we return to campus. It was a beautiful day and I was amazed by how much the place had changed.
What hasn't changed is the library. There are so many memories in that place. I couldn't bring myself to climb the stairs to the second floor for fear my heart would explode from bittersweet nostalgia. In hindsight, those days were so wonderfully arduous.
It is such a small school (300 students or so) in a VERY rural part of Vermont. As we sat chatting with our old professor it seemed much quieter than I remember. Maybe I was just louder back in the day? I kept looking over my shoulder searching for familiar faces. It is such a beautiful place but without those faces it seemed empty.
As Pat and I wandered about, I came to the realization that without the individuals you remember a place is just a place. It was nice to visit and see that the college is still so beautiful, but there was an emptiness that was new and disconcerting. Those people that helped shape who we have become are gone. What I am left with are little flashes of memory that cause my heart to flutter.
It is true that time heals all wounds. That may seem like a no-brainer but I had been harboring so many negative feelings, and then all of a sudden they were just gone. I realized that all those crazy, mixed up days helped me figure out who I am and ultimately made me wiser.
Thank you Marlboro College for the chance to study art and travel to Vietnam. Because of you I have a best friend, a husband and so many memories. Of course there is a financial debt, but any negativity I had for you is gone. I've gained knowledge and wisdom and self-awareness through those struggles I endured. Thank you.
Do you have any places you have revisited? Did they change for you? This was a very surreal experience and I am so happy to have had it. Thanks for looking. Love, Ms. Kate.
